When I reflect on what has transpired in just a few months of being in the DreamForum, I am simply in awe of how God has been working on my heart as much as He has been working in my business.
The structure and support that the DreamForum has provided me is exactly what I needed to reestablish a robust rhythm of activating, cultivating and aligning a Sound Mind, Strong Body and Sage Spirit. I am so happy to report that I am holistically healthier than I have been in years: I have been more intentional and diligent in my business strategic planning; I recommitted to my fitness journey and have been regularly going to the gym, as well as improved my nutrition; I have been so much more consistent in my quiet time and shifted from perfunctory and performative devotional reading to Bible reading and prayer that has deepened my sense of connection to God and the calling He has placed in my heart.
Something I have (re)learned during this time is just how patient and generous God is with me. I am a recovering control freak, so God often has to remind me that it is He—and not I—who is in control. When I have an audacious vision or ambitious goal, I often want to see it come to fruition immediately—and can become frustrated, disappointed and/or discouraged when something is not happening fast enough based on my timeline. However, God is not bound by my desires and preferences, and in hindsight I am always grateful for His perfect timing.
In the past I have been extremely stubborn and adamant about my own will and getting my own way, convinced that I can “make” something happen faster or better than God. Of course, I am always proven wrong, which is why I have evolved over the years to trust in Him more and to believe that as Tim Keller once said, “God answers our prayers by giving us what we would have prayed for if we knew what He knows.” However, the DreamForum premise and mantra of “receiving vs. achieving” has been a beautiful paradigm shift for me and reaffirms my own mantra of #gracegritandglory and the “formula” of God’s Grace + Our Grit = Holy Glory.
It has been WILD to me to witness and experience God bringing so many opportunities to me vs. me chasing after them (which has usually been my MO), and it makes me wonder if I’d been more diligent in my Trellis rhythms of resources, routines and rituals in the past, perhaps I would have seen this type of progress earlier. However, I always hold tight to the beauty of Philippians 1:6 and Romans 8:28 and believe that my blessings can never bypass me because I can be confident that He who began a good work in me will ultimately work it out for my good and His glory.
I have also been surprised by how quickly our cohort bonded on our initial retreat, as well as how powerful my time with my prayer partner, Sarah, has been. The cadence and consistency of having someone to engage in a guided time of stillness, reflection and spiritual dialogue has been such a gift.
Lastly, despite having a solid faith foundation and gratitude for the journey, there are still challenging moments—particularly when I feel the push and pull of the work life harmony I am seeking to possess and promote. As a working mother, wife and daughter (to aging parents) who is pursuing some very ambitious entrepreneurial goals, I can sometimes feel as though I am not doing any of them as well as I could if I were to just dedicate myself solely to one area. Sometimes I struggle with wondering if I am making the right choices in how I’m using my time and that can result in experiencing “mom/wife/daughter/work guilt” with a side of anxiety…but I ultimately have to give it all to God and trust that He can redeem, restore and renew anything that I may inadvertently cause to require redemption, restoration or renewal.
As I prepare to finish my time with the DreamForum, I pray that I can maintain the momentum and conviction (and community!) that I have gradually been building…but something that is actually quite comforting is knowing that even if I fall out of rhythm or experience a major setback, I have the power to intentionally partner with God again at ANY time and reset to IMMEDIATELY feel His presence and know that His sovereignty, love and grace are always covering me.
Christina Farinacci-Roberts is one of twelve Dreamers in Goldenwood’s 2024 Dream Forum. This reflection is part of Goldenwood’s #InsidetheDreamPod series. Hear more and connect with Christina at the Dream Forum on November 14th.
About Christina’s Dream, SOULARISE Leadership: My dream is to create an entire MOVEMENT that involves women finding greater clarity, capacity and contentment in who they are that leads to them achieving greater freedom, fulfillment and flow in what they do so they can accelerate their ascension and pursue an ever elevated existence…all while in COMMUNITY. These positive effects will then ripple out into their homes and in their workplaces, which will enhance flourishing exponentially all around. Essentially, when you edify, nurture and honor your soul, as well as the body that houses it, you will show up as your truest, highest self with authenticity and authority that will better position you to be who God has called you to be and do what He has called you to do.